New Shoes

May 21, 2016

"No." My mother commanded firmly, her toes clinching defensively as if into the souls of her brand new Born wedges, though I wore them now.  The regret for having boasted about them, their incredible comfort, their business-casual style, painted her usually tan skin a ghostly tint.  I took another step, and basket in ecstasy as my foot seemed to dive into a sea of cushion and arch support.  I said nothing, but when our gazes met, she heard my every thought, "No." She repeated, her ferocity battered down to a defeated mutter.  I borrowed her shoes all of the time, sure, but never these.  These were game changing. I knew I could break her, it would be easy, but could I really live with myself if I did?

 

 Apparently so. 

 

"I'm just trying to impress the business professionals." I whimpered back.  Ruthless.  My school's New York trip was hours away, and still my best option for footwear was a beaten pare of Merrills, but even so, I felt dirty for inflicting such a low blow, but desperate times (and early onset orthopedic issues) called for desperate measures. 

 

"Take them..."  She sighed.  

 

A wave of nausea washed over me, and suddenly my feet were drowning in an ocean of shame.  What had I done?  My mother had sacrificed so much for me, yet here I was, sucking more and more of her soul away, dwindling her down to nothing.

 

"I... I  can't."  I stuttered back, the room now spinning, Where am I? My disoriented mind wondered, "WHO am I?"  This had gotten out of hand too quickly, and I could feel myself sinking.  My dissonance echoed loudly throughout the room.  Would anything ever be the same again?  Then, a miracle happened.  Some might say it was a fluke, but I knew better.  I could feel the universe aligning, changing something inside of her.  

 

"You need them." She said now, all reluctance a distance memory.  "Take them."   

 

And with her sincere blessing, I did.  I was right, it seemed, that with taking these shoes, things would never be quite the same, but sometimes, change is for the better. 

 

 

                                                              END SCENE 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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